What heart failure teaches me about success
(By Chris Lytle) My mission is to make successful people succeed sooner. Sarah and I wrote this mission statement 35 years ago. Hold that thought.
One of my latest book purchases is Success Through Heart Failure Review: Help and Hope for People with Congestive Heart Failure by Marc Silver, MD.
Congestive Heart Failure: This is what I have and one of the reasons I was away from the microphone for most of December and January.
The first paragraph of Success Through Heart Failure offers great advice for anyone facing adversity.
Chapter 1 is titled: Don’t Be Angry. Silver writes, “I feel like I should say a few words about anger and emotions before moving on to other topics. Heart failure, in reality, is usually a chronic disease process, which means that although there is often no complete cure, there are ways to improve and stabilize the disease and certainly better ways to understand it and live with it. However, when most patients initially hear the words heart failure, which is indeed an unfortunate and lucky term, they equate the term with fatality, and a range of emotions emerges – or, more often, does not emerge – and ends up having an impact on the patient’s relationships. a with doctors, nurses and family members.
When I recorded my last bite of knowledge in early December 2021, I could barely say two sentences without pausing. I was short of breath and had no energy left to walk the 11 minutes to the office. I took the elevator instead of climbing the 24 steps to my office on the second floor. Classic denial.
Finally, I went to the emergency room. “You have A-fib and congestive heart failure,” the doctor said. I couldn’t feel my heart beating 155 times per minute, but it was.
I was angry at first. I worked and ate well. Then I started thinking about some of the things I had done wrong again. And I decided not to think or say, “This shouldn’t happen to me. And I accepted that it happened to me. And that acceptance helped me focus on the positive steps I could take to heal.
Early in my sales training career, I encountered this definition of training: “Training is a planned program designed to impart specific knowledge, skills, and attitudes to increase desired behavior in a meaningful way. measurable.”
So this is sales training, because I’m talking about attitude.
Psychologist Julie Colwell, PhD is the author of The Inner Map Navigate your emotions to create the life you want.
Here’s her take on the matter: She writes, “What’s happening shouldn’t be happening.”
We seem to share a cultural perspective that with enough planning, forethought, or thought, we can make life predictable, keep it in check. The corollary to this is that when something unforeseen happens, it is a personal failure. Many criticisms in relationships stem from this: “If you had paid that bill on time, we wouldn’t have that extra charge;” “Why do you have such a big reaction? I never liked this kind of food; “What were you thinking! You should have known those ideas would never work.
Keeping our focus on what we should have done to prevent what is happening from happening is the perfect recipe for self-hatred. The self-flagellation that comes from thinking that we should have been able to stop what is happening from happening is actually a reverse version of the belief that we should be able to control the uncontrollable. It also means we’re watching the wrong show: we’re looking back, with an analysis of what we should/could/would have done. But it’s already done. It’s finish.
The alternative is to enter the gift. All the research that money can buy will not prevent the present from being what it is. (Look at New Coke.) And placing our attention on the past prevents us from facing all the details of what is happening around us right now – where we can actually do something, react and take action for what we really want .
How much energy do you expend trying to correct what has already happened? What would it be like for you to be squarely with what is, in the moment, without thinking about trying to make the past different? How does this change your personal effectiveness? Your serenity?
Staying in the present has helped me a lot. Doctors, friends and relatives said, you have such a good attitude. I look forward to my cardiologist saying this in the plan Here are the next steps. let’s go
Like selling, healing is a process. I’m willing to work this process for all I’m worth.
I was hospitalized for 29 days. It’s a trip I wouldn’t have taken, but I’m grateful to still be here and still helping make successful people succeed sooner.
Chris Lytle, thanks for your patience, glad to be back.
Chris Lytle, Instant Sales Training, has conducted thousands of seminars for radio advertising professionals. He is the author of several books on sales. You can contact Chris at https://instantsalestraining.com/ or call 423.541.3950.